Neil Young, 'Heart of Gold'
I have a question i sometimes ask upon meeting new people that intrigue me. I firstly define the word 'vice' to mean 'a particular thing that you enjoy. Something you derive a heightened sense of pleasure from, yet at the same time, it can and does also have a somewhat detrimental effect of you - whether that be health, wealth, emotional state, lifestyle or other'. Then, i ask:
"What's your vice?"
Most people run first to drink or drugs or cigarettes. Sure, these are acceptable responses, but they also lack a creativity and honesty. So often, the booze or the pills may be either symptomatic or emblematic of your vice/s, but there's usually a far more interesting answer that one can mine out with just a little bit of probing.
You'd assume that i ask this question, because the answer would give me great little snapshot of the questionee and help me assign a first impression. Yes, it does help with that whole book-cover-judging thing, but in reality it has much more to do with one of my hobbies, which also doubles as one of my vices. I collect vices. Not just mine, but those of others. However, unlike the manner of a stamp-collecting hobbyist, i don't have a folio where i store my acquisitions and look back upon them later. I simply enjoy the question, pondering and answer
experience, without a need to revisit these collected vices of my peers.
Now, despite this hobby being something that i really enjoy, i have not practiced it much during my time here (well, up until now anyways). I've been so much more of a 'viewer' as a opposed to a 'participator' in my time here. Well, the other night i participated.
"Sex, cigarettes and alcohol"
Hmmm, that answer was a bit too contrite. I mean i did see the Londoner actually receive a thrill off either or all of these pursuits, but i felt there was something more interesting underneath. If i would have had a little scratch below the surface, i would have found her real vice. Normally, that's exactly what i would have done, but something has changed in me . I now crave the surface and only the surface. So i found myself catching and stopping the almost reflex prod into what lay underneath and just meandered along on a different conversation stream.
I'm not sure if i can attribute this approach as something influenced by The City. Sure New York is all about the show; all about the appearance of things, but so is the city of my youth. No, it ain't my environment that's morphing me, rather my mindset pushing me into certain habitats, certain positions and certain vices of The City itself. I've become the responsibility-free traveler ready for my loose and loitering Summer of '69. I'm only 40 years late, but i have the bung knee and really bad back so i move a little slower than some.
The flip side is that i would have loved to have ended this blog by revealing to you some profound discovery into the Londoner's inner spirit. However, all i discovered was that she was heading back to London too soon, wore great shoes, did in fact like booze and sex and didn't need too much from me or about me.
Hey, maybe that could be my new vice - not giving too much and not taking too much.
